The Adventures of Commander Kallisto Chapter 18

Commander Kallisto looked at the map of the Badlands with eyes full of tactical fervor as Seleukos presented the current situation. “So the Basket have already taken four Goblin worlds?”

“Yes Commander.” Seleukos  stated shyly. “It appears that the Basket have taken advantage of the Goblin Queen’s overthrow.

“Damn…” Kallisto rolled her fingers on the meeting table.
To Kallisto’s side Lieutenant Eudokia face grew into a wide smile. “But that’s perfect, we wanted to take them on next, and they are coming at us. More starships to blast.”

Diodotus rolled his eyes. “Blasting starships isn’t exactly why we came to the Badlands Eudokia…”

Eudokia shrugged rubbing her dark feathery hair back and giving Diodotus a miscuvous look. “Well some of us apparently came here to run around naked with Artemisia while battle is going on.”

Diodotus blushed as he thought of an appropriate retort, but it was Kallisto that spoke. “We aren’t here to blast starships or run around naked with the Harpi troops.” Kallisto gave Diodotus a sideways look. “No matter how fun that may sound.”

“Not fun at all Commander…”

Kallisto tried her best to hide her chuckle, Eudokia didn’t make an effort to hide hers. “But that isn’t the point.” Kallisto stood from her seat and placed her hands behind her in a militaristic pose. “Our purpose here was to bring order and contain the chaos that has been spreading out of the Badlands.”

“Well if that’s our purpose Commander, we’ve haven’t had the greatest of starts.”

“But why? I don’t want the damn pacifist Celestials telling us that we’re failures, and that the only way to bring peace to the Badlands is through charity work. Why isn’t this working…we took down one of the 13 Warlordesses of the Badlands and installed a puppet.”

“Well Commander.” Seleukos said meekly. “That in itself might be the problem.”

“What…are you going to tell me we should have rather sent charity work to the Goblin Queen to make her raid merchant ships less?”

“No of course not Commander, but..” Seleukos avoided the commanders gaze.

“But what?”

“But we left a power vacuum and a power vacuum breads chaos and disorder. What the Goblin Queen established may have been a terrible regime, but she still held a monopoly of violence within her borders.”

Kallisto’s green eyes observed Seleukos carefully. “That much I know, the problem is that the new Goblin Queen isn’t being very effective at reestablishing her sister’s monopoly of violence.”

“But can we actually blame her? The center of authority of all Goblin space was forced to dance naked for their new Tolani overlords and then a Tolani puppet was installed in her place. All the credibility the new Goblin Queen may have had as a rebel leader vanished when it was us that installed her.”

“Damn…I’ve always had trouble with my subtlety. Well the Basket are certainly taking advantage of the power vacuum, and luckily they have taken out a couple of the Goblin Queen’s rivals to power. So let’s focus on them first shall we.”

“Of course commander.” An image of the Basket slaver queen appeared on the screen, she wore a white toga with golden jewels that matched her golden eyes. “The Basket are one of the oldest spacefaring civilizations in the galaxy. Almost as old as the Grays and older than any of the Big Power systems, whether it be the Gray-Reptilian alliance, the Gray-Reptilian-Celestial Confederation, the Gray-Reptilian-Celestial-Tolani Council, or the current Five Power system of the Tolani-Gray-Celestial-Terran-Voider system.”

“Seleukos…get to the point before I fall asleep.” Eudokia said as she stifled a yawn.

“Yes of course, I apologize. The Basket were a galactic power before galactic power was even a term. The ruins that the former Goblin Queen made her home were in fact Basket ruins when their empire used to control the Badlands. But their empire has long since become that…ruins of its former glory. And there is where the Slaver Queen comes into the picture. Anubarris, born into one of the most prestigious of Basket families, through her own sheer will and determination brought together the factions of slavers that made up her people into one unified source of authority.”

Diodotus shrugged. “So why don’t we just let her unify the badlands under her control…hell if we take her out aren’t we doing the same exact thing we did to the Goblins? What central authority would control them?”

“Because…slavery is a disgusting thing AND I’m not letting the Celestial tell me that I told you so. They already sent out their Nimrodi to capture me and parade me naked for what I did to their Princess.”

“Not very pacifist of them is it.”

“When did Pacifists ever make sense?”

“Good point.”

“Go on Seleukos.” Kallisto waved towards the presenter.

“Yes well, technically her base is the old Basket capital world, but she is more of a front line commander, meaning that her flagship is in fact her base of operations. And meaning that she is leading her own invasion of Goblin space.”

“I’m starting to like this Slaver Queen, like a true Tolani Archon she leads her troops from the front. Not bad. Well other than the whole slavery thing. And raiding Five Power space to get them.”

“If I may interject Commander.” Seleukos said with his signature meek voice.

“What is it?”

“If we do intend to bring down the thirteen warlordesses, would it not make sense to start providing some type of future structure for the Badlands, other than just installing puppets? We are simply one warship taking on an entire region of space, and with Nimrodi after us.”

“Good, I want you and Doctor to discuss possibilities on that front. I need to focus on taking down the Slaver Queen, but I expect to hear your ideas soon.”

“Yes Commander.”

X
The Doctor grimaced and blushed a shade of golden red as she tried to hide her embarrassment with her golden hair. Unfortunately for her, her recent encounter with Tolani wasps left her backside quite swollen and exposed, with only a pair of ice packs covering each cheek. Wearing pants or even the lightest of underwear would only irritate the bites. “Seleukos…”

Seleukos tried his best to avoid looking at the Doctor’s exposed backside, but didn’t have much success at it. “Doctor…”

“So we’re supposed to build some type of post warlordess government then?”

“Yes.”

“Do you mind…if you stopped looking at my ass…” Doctor Myrinne grumbled.

“I…I’m sorry…it’s just…very distracting.”

“Well sorry! It’s not my fault that Tolani wasps decided to go all out on my backside.”

“Well technically it kind of is…you were using them for torture.”
Myrinne’s eyes opened wide. “And I will torture you beyond anything you can imagine if you don’t stop looking at my backside!”

“I…yes…of course…how long are you going to be incapacitated from wearing pants…?”  

“Like another week.”

“That…could be distracting.”

“Oh whatever…just pay attention to the task at hand will you!” Myrinne growled.

X
Eudokia sat at the bar drinking some Tolani wine by herself only half awake after a long day of patrolling the Goblin Basket border. She didn’t even notice when Subcommander Dodotus took the seat next to her. “Can I get you a drink?”

“Huh?” Eudokia said opening her eyes wider. “Oh it’s you, na, don’t want to have my aim become sideways because of too much wine.”

Dedotus shrugged. “You think we’ll see some action tomorrow then? The Basket seem to be doing their best to keep their distance whenever we show up.”

“Maybe you and Artemisia should go running around naked again, maybe that will attract the slavers for a pair of sex slaves.” Eudokia chuckled.

“You’re never going to let me live that down are you?”

“Nope.”

“Well it seems like it’s actually becoming a trend, let’s not forget what happened to Spike as well.”

Spike cracked her knuckled behind Dodotus. “And what happened to me exactly?”

“Oh nothing.” Dodotus said with an innocent shrug. “You’re an exemplary warrior as always. How’s Artemisia doing?”

“She’s doing fine, still a little shaken up. Her feathers are growing back rather well, she should be back in the front line soon.”

A coy smile came onto Eudokia’s face. “So tell us Spike.”

“What?”

“Did you keep the gold bikini? The one the Goblin Queen forced you to dance in?”

“Why, do you want to give everyone a dance in it as well?”

“Haha very funny.” Eudokia shrugged. “It’s nice to have your spiky wit back.

“I’m just hoping to see some action soon. Where are all these Basket slavers hiding at anyways?”

“You’re telling me?! I haven’t shot anything in ages. How is it that the Goblin Queen’s reign is crumbling, yet there isn’t one damn thing to shoot at?”

X
Goblin Queen Pinky growled at her Chief Economic advisor. “What do you mean we don’t have enough money to hire mercenaries?”

The Goblin’s antenna’s went rigid as he rubbed his wide girth. “Well my Queen, the problem is that…”

“My sister had vaults full of gold! Where did all that go huh? Did you steal it?”

“No my Queen. Of course not.” The Chief Economic advisor stumbled.

Pinky rubbed her forehead. “Well then. Where did it go?”

“Well general Gork took about a quarter when he defected to become his own warlord, and his brother general Zork took another quarter. The rest we’ve been using to maintain what’s left of our military and worlds.”

“Well why isn’t more money coming in?”

“Well…the Tolani restrict our pirating and black market activities…those were our biggest sources of revenue. We aren’t exactly raiding merchant vessels from the five galactic powers anymore.”

Pinky sighed. “So we’ve replaced the Reptilian yoke with the Tolani yoke basically is what you are saying?”

“What I am saying your majesty is that the Reptilians allowed us to bring money is, but the Tolani are going to bring us to ruin.”

“Damn that Tolani prude commander, she’s going to ruin me. Bring my sister in, I want to talk to her.”

“Yes my queen.” The Chief Economic Minister signaled the guards to get the old Goblin Queen. The sight of her sister caused Pinky to laugh a little, the former queen was still completely naked as she was paraded around the royal palace every other day and the makeup they forced her to wear made her look more like a clown then a former queen.

“Pinky! Haven’t I been humiliated enough already?!” The former queen pleaded.

“Ha! You did the same thing to me Nosey, serves you right!”

Nosey blushed as one of the guards gave her butt cheek a light slap. “I am one of the Thirteen Warlordesses Pinky!”

“You were, I’m the new Goblin Queen remember.”

“Ha! And what good has that done us? Don’t you think I see you are bringing us to ruin? That Tolani commander doesn’t have a clue how the Goblin economy functions. She
just thought she could overthrow me and…make me into a laughing stock intergalactic net meme…and that would make us all good Tolani puppets, is that what she thought?”

“Oh right I saw a new meme of you dancing naked to some Celestial song.”

Nosey blushed red with both embarrassment and rage. “That isn’t the point sister, if things keep on going the way they are going we’re both going to end up as Basket slaves, along with that clueless Tolani commander. Well that last one I do hope for, with the Baskets whipping her bare behind until she cries out for her stupid bird mommy. But we’re sisters Pinky!”

“Ha…sisters. You paraded me naked on every Goblin world.”

“And you’re parading me naked every other day! Don’t you think we’re even by now? Let’s rule as sisters! Forget the Reptilians and the Tolani, we can rule on our own right. Or are you too stupid to figure that out Pinky!?”

“Such an affront to your queen!” Pinky pointed at one of the guards. “Take her away and make sure she gets a good public spanking.”

“No!!! Not one of those again! I’m one of the Thirteen Warlordesses! No!!!!” The guard took Nosey away to what must have been her fourth public spanking. But Pinky contemplated the joint queenship she mentioned, she wouldn’t be able to go against the Tolani by herself…she’d need a scapegoat if things went wrong.